February 7, 2012


Do you offend enough people? If not, unveil more of your personality.

“Offend” may be the wrong word. “Polarize” may be better. Do you attract/repel people? Yes, you do. There’s not much you can do about this.

Inappropriate Photo?

Your reaction to the photo will depend on your opinion of cats and what you think is funny. If you're offended, would you feel differently if you knew this cat likes sitting here when the equipment is off? Would you mind if this were a cartoon?

Here’s the core question: do you atrract/repel the right people?

Blatant Ways

Consciously or not, you bring others closer or push them away. For example, you may
  • use profanity
  • tell off-colour jokes
  • express your views on religion, politics or current affairs
  • gripe
  • blame others
Even if no one objects out loud, you're offending some and attracting others.

Subtle Ways

Your rough edges also show in other ways. There's no right or wrong.
  • are you technician or a personality?
  • do you pay attention to detail or focus on the big points?
  • do you answer your phone whenever it rings or only when you're in a quiet environment?
  • do you focus on quality or prefer to cut costs?
  • are you a specialist or generalist?
  • are you big-city or small-town?
  • young or old?
  • educated or self-taught?
  • spender or frugal?
Each has an effect. 

The Wrong Fish

If you're not happy with the clients you're attracting, you'll need to make changes. Since we can't see ourselves objectively, you'll probably need outside help to see what's wrong. You can soften some edges while remaining true to yourself.

Try This

You may have difficulty overcoming first impressions and stereotypes. That's why you want to help shape the initial opinions and confound expectations. Let people see the real you as quickly as you can. They’ll learn the truth eventually. If the interpersonal chemistry isn’t there, will they buy from you? It doesn’t matter how much time you spend with them or how logical your arguments.

Can potential clients experience you without the hassle of meeting you? Yes. Online with text, audio, video and photos.


PS This post was written years ago but never published.

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