TRY GIVING UNSOLICITED FEEDBACK

Have you thought of giving feedback to people you barely know?

There's little downside since you haven't made a deep connection. You've barely made a connection at all. Yet you can easily set yourself apart with this free sample of your thinking.

Unrequested feedback isn't the same as making your views public to stand out, which deals with publishing. Here the receiver knows who you are, whether you share your views live in person, or later by email or phone. This feedback isn't the same as showing gratitude, though there is a selfless component here too.

Three Examples

Here's what I did at an entrepreneur event yesterday

1. told the speaker she said "um" often (she caught herself using that same crutch word a few minutes later)
2. told a person that university-level words made her 60 second group introduction hard to follow and less compelling (she plans to speak more vividly and simply)
3. told a person that his self-printed business card looked cheap (he explained that proper cards were being printed)

Your feedback will attract or repel. That's fine. That's ideal. That's bound to happen over time. Now's the best and cheapest time to find out. I didn't get slapped or belted once.

Waste

People give plenty of feedback but rarely to the person who could directly benefit. Telling your friends about slow service robs the restaurant an opportunity to improve.

Win

Those who appreciate your help will remember, like you more and perhaps mention you to others. They might be inspired to help others.

When you're more attentive to others, you'll be more alert to your own foibles. That helps you improve.

Lose

When you give feedback, you might cause offense. Learning how to give feedback reduces the risk but not completely. Toastmasters is a safe place to practice.

Those who feel offended may resist your input, a sign of a fixed mindset. They're tough to help. Wouldn't you rather know that now?

You may not get thanks, but when you stand up, you stand out.

Links

• Make your views public to stand out
• How to give feedback (Seth Godin)
• Two ways to show gratitude
• Why I finally joined Toastmasters
• Image courtesy of Julie Elliott-Abshire (Texas)

PS Give suggestions for improvements in private.